Funny Golf Expressions For
The Golf Course
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The hole. The cup. The place to put your
putts. When you sink a putt, you canned
The green. Soft, well-manicured fairways
are also referred to as being "like
Term for when two golfers riding in the
same golf cart repeatedly hit the ball
in the same direction (usually into the
rough). An efficient but not necessarily
pleasant way to play golf.
Does it open up over there?
A phrase often used on holes with
doglegs. The answer is almost always
"No" but playing partners will respond
with "I'm not sure." This conversation
takes place even if you have played this
course 50 times.
Derogatory term for a golf course that
is not well maintained.
A shot that travels only a few feet,
usually without getting airborne.
To miss the ball completely. The air
moves, but nothing else does.
A terrible shot. Putt, chip, pitch,
drive—it doesn't matter. If you hit it
bad, you flubbed it, buddy.
A message from golfer to ball asking it
to cease flying—now! Usually heard after
a ball is hit too far or offline; almost
always uttered with great agitation.
A message from golfer to ball asking it
A conceded putt, shortened from the
phrase "Give it to me." Gimmes are the
center of many golfing controversies,
especially amongst the ranks of amateurs
who are always looking for an opponent
to concede a putt, even if their ball is
off the green.
A terrible golfer. A person who hacks it
around the golf course.
In the leather
Phrase meaning a putt is close enough to
the cup (a distance no greated than the
length of the putter grip) to be
The yearning chasm that is in front of
the cup, when a putt stops just inches
short of its intended destination. For
example, "He left it right in the jaws."
A putt in the three-to-four foot range
that causes emotional and physical
problems for the golfer. The term comes
from the nervous trembling that
accompanies these short putts.
The one iron. The toughest club to hit.
If you carry a knife in your bag, you're
either a real player, or phony who wants
to look like a real player. A few swings
with the knife will reveal the true you.
Lee Trevino advises golfers caught in a
lightening storm to hold their one irons
aloft because "even God can't hit a one
A flawless swing a' la Tom Purtzer or
Steve Elkington or Tiger Woods.
To miss-hit a shot.
Nineteenth hole, the
The bar and grill you visit after your
round. This is the place where most
golfers find their best lies.
When you hit an iron shot without taking
a divot, you have nipped it. Good
golfers do this in an attempt to
minimize backspin; bad golfers do it by
On the screws
Description for a well-executed shot. In
the good 'ol days, when woods were made
of wood, club makers fitted a piece of
plastic insert into the club face as a
safeguard against premature wear. These
inserts were fastened to the club with
screws. When a golf would hit a good
shot, he would say, "I hit it on the
Whenever the ball lies at the same
elevation as the hole.
A shot that heads right for the
flagstick from the moment it leaves the
Pitch and putt
A derisive term given to golf courses
that are short and easily conquered, so
named because just a pitch and a putt
will get you into the hole.
Play 'em down
To play the ball as it lies. The only
way to fly.
Term for a low, hard hook that will run
great distances after hitting the
ground. Very bad.
Whenever the ball is moving along the
ground, it is said to be running.
A shank is a severe miss hit in which
the golf ball is struck by the hosel of
the club. On a shank, a player has
managed to strike the ball with a part
of the club other than the clubface. A
shanked shot will scoot a short
distance, often out to the right, or
might be severely sliced or hook.
Someone who shanks a lot might be said
to "have the shanks" or to be "shanking
Where you are when you hit the fairway
with your drive.
The putter, so named because it's the
shortest club in the bag. You can make
up for a lot of bad work with other
sticks if you can handle the short
A short, easy putt, that anyone can
A putt that's long enough so that it's
not a gimme but short enough so that a
decent player should hole it, so called
because it tests a golfer's skill.
When you use your putter from off the
green, that a club becomes a Texas
wedge, so named bacause the shot became
popular in Texas, where hard, dry
conditions make it less risky to putt
from off the green.
Thin, hit it
To hit the ball in the center with the
club's leading edge, instead of sliding
under it. Chances are your shot will fly
lower and farther than you intended.
This is still much better than hitting
If there is very little cushion (grass)
between the ball and God's earth, you
have a tight lie. If the guys in your
group don't want to play for some cash,
Anything bad that happens to you on the
course, especially when you hit a poor
shot, is ugly. So when you hit an
incredibly bad shot, don't curse, just
say, "Man, that was ugly," and everyone
will nod in understanding.
Up and down
A way of describing the short game; if
you chip on and then one -putt, you're
up and down in two. Also, when your
level of play alternates between good
and bad, you're having and up-and-down
A shot hit with a
higher-than-anticipated trajectory to a
point short of the target. Also called
A putt that rolls all the way around the
edge of the cup before coming out.
Golfers who play infrequently, so called
because the only time they can play is
When you swing at the ball and miss.
In certain areas where the winters are
harsh, golf courses don't receive much
maintenance between October and April.
To make winter golf more palatable in
these areas, many courses enact winter
rules, which provide for improved lies
under certain circumstances. Winter
rules are fair since golf was not meant
to be played on a poorly maintained
course, though the Scots play on rough
A putt that is pulled to the left.
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