Funny Golf Dictionary -
Golf Dictionary - What
golf terms really mean
- The Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St.
Andrews, founded in 1754 and the oldest
golf club in existence. As such, it holds
many "firsts" in the game of golf: first
accusation of an altered scorecard (1754);
first disqualification for use of improper
equipment (1754); first suspension for profanity
(1754); first caddy fired for accepting
a bribe (1754); first expulsion for throwing
clubs (1754); first properly replaced divot
(1897); first twosome permitted to play
through (1924); first totally restored bunker
surface following the play of a sand shot
(1946); first completely honest handicap
claim (1957); and first lost ball recovered
by a following golfer and returned to its
rightful owner (1984).
Rain - See 5th & 15th Holes.
A, shot that is hit very high, so called
because it travels close to
To pull the ball back into the hole
casually with your putter after missing
a putt. Amateurs often miss these rake jobs
and then still count the stroke as holed
because they only made a token effort. That's
- this is the area where you go to
practice. It usually has many stations
to hit practice shots.
it in When a putt bounces around the
hole a bit before dropping into the cup,
a golfer has rattled it in. This usually
occurs when a putt has been struck firmly
into the hole.
the Green - Since greens are rarely
level and their surfaces vary in smoothness
or "speed" depending on how moist the grass
is and how recently it was cut, golfers
must examine them closely to determine which
way and how far the ball will roll. Even
the "friendliest"-looking green will have
some tricks up its sleeve, and many are
downright ornery. Thus the "message" of
any given green, as read by the well trained
eye of a seasoned player, can range from
"Aim a little to the left" or "Look out-anything
more than a light tap will run right by
the hole" to "The best thing you can do
with that putter is make it into a decorative
lamp base" or "You'll be lucky to four-putt,
and by the way, those are absolutely the
ugliest pants I have ever seen."
golf In ready golf each player may "fire
when ready," a procedure instituted to speed
Shot - Any shot whose primary purpose
is to get the ball out of a hazard or away
from an obstacle and back into playable
position on the fairway. The most important
thing to remember when playing recovery
shots is not to be greedy. It's far easier
to forget to include in your score a single
short shot that put the ball into the middle
of the fairway than to try to get
away without counting a half-dozen
duffs, caroms or ricochets.
A score of seventy-seven, named after
the number worn by the football great.
- In golf, perhaps more than in any other
game, relaxation is essential. Any tension
in a player's body is instantly transferred
to the swing or the putting motion, and
the results are invariably disastrous. Even
a slightly taut muscle can misdirect the
path of the Club Head, sending an expensive
ball into the water. An unnecessarily stiffened
joint can lead to the kind of jarring, ground-hitting
stroke that causes cumulative shaft-related
damage to costly clubs and can lead to possible
bone injury as well. And an overly rigid
grip could, paradoxically, cause a muscular
twitch that might allow the club to slip
from the fingers during the follow-through,
perhaps maiming another player and triggering
a multimillion-dollar lawsuit.
So for goodness sake, try to relax!
To hit an errant tee shot and tee up
a second ball. A term also used each time
the beer cart Approaches, as in "Let's reload."
- The edge of the hole. A ball that goes
around the cup without falling in is said
to have rimmed the hole, or to have ringed,
skirted, upped, lapped or looped it. It
may also be said to have curled, circled
or rolled around it, or to have done a tour,
a circuit, a round trip, an orbit or a buttonhook.
There are one or two terms for a ball actually
going into the cup, but they are used so
seldom that it seems like a waste of space
to include them here.
A good player who enters a competition
under less than truthful circumstances,
usually by claiming a handicap that is much
higher than it should be. Also known as
a What you give your ball when you clean
it in a ball washer—or in the lake.
Golfers love to complain about being
robbed, usually when a putt doesn't break
when it should have, or when a putt travelling
at Mach 2 doesn't fall into the hole as
it should have, or when a tee shot forty
yards offline winds up six inches out of
bounds. If you want to be cool on the golf
course, don't whine about being robbed every
time something doesn't go your way.
the The pill. The ball.
When somebody's a good putter, you say,
"Man, he can really roll it." Roll can also
be used when players roll the boll over
in the fairway to get an improved lie.
coaster An up-and-down round.
Term for a low, hard hook that will
run great distances after hitting the ground.
- Un-mown, naturally wild area bordering
the fairway and sometimes separating the
fairway from the tee. There are three basic
types of rough: low rough, a narrow strip
of 6-inch-high grass where the ball may
be easily playable; high or deep rough,
where the ball may be lost and, even if
found, may be obstructed or otherwise unplayable;
and dark rough, where the ball may be eaten
or stolen and used as an object of worship
by primitive peoples.
- Eighteen holes of golf, played in their
proper sequence, followed by one or more
additional rounds at the 19th hole.
Term used facetiously to describe a
par that is made under anything but routine
circumstances. For example, if you hole
out an eighty-yard wedge shot for par, you
might exclaim, "Another routine par, my
the Green - A phrase used in the rules
of golf to describe a situation in which
the flight of a ball is interrupted
by anything other than another player in
the match or his or her caddy or equipment.
In such cases the match is continued and
the ball is played from wherever it lands
unless "whatever accidentally stopped or
deflected the ball rattles, hisses, spits,
growls or snarls; or stings, bites or drools;
or makes menacing gestures or motions, or
circles or makes ready to pounce; or has
claws, fangs, a gun, a badge or a lawyer."
- As currently constituted, the rules of
golf consist of 34 basic regulations. The
present record for breaking them in a single
18-hole round is an astonishing 31, with
69 penalty strokes, set in 1983 by H. B.
Nichols at Bluster Bluffs C.C. in Smug Harbor,
Whenever the ball is moving along the ground,
it is said to be running. This is also what
you should do if you bet and then don't
have enough money to cover your losses.